Thoughts and Shots: May 12, 2016

Google Keep reminds me every week that I'm working on a Project 52. My heavy purse reminds me that at any moment I can pull out my camera and be a shot closer to being a better photographer. That said, it's hard to pull it out and take shots for a number of reasons. If nothing else, this challenge may help me care a little less about what others think, and that's a step in the right direction for me.

This past week I went to Acerogami in Downtown Pomona for an Insecure Alex show. Another set of musicians that I really like, Jook and Pro, were going to open up for them and I figured it would be a good opportunity to just take some shots. I decided to commit to nothing but my ID, debit card, phone, lip gloss, and camera. More importantly, I decided not to worry about what people might think of me as I weaved in and out of them taking pictures. I ended up with nearly 150 shots and a chance to practice some editing.

Unfortunately, everything I know how to do in Lightroom has either come from watching someone do a quick editing demo at a workshop or googling "how do I _____ in lightroom?" I know the basics of composition and exposure. I also know there are LOTS of things you can do in Lightroom. The problem is I don't know what all those things are or why I would want to do them. So I started by adjusting my photos using the overlay tool and cropping them to be 5 x 7.

The venue was dark and the stage light colors were constantly changing. I think I ended up with a lot of shots that were underexposed because every time I would hit Auto Tone, the exposure would be increased. At first I found myself wanting to do that for every shot, but the more I worked, the more I noticed they lost some of their "effect." I don't even know what that effect was, mind you, I just knew that it was important to fight the urge to simply hit Auto Tone. I tried to manually adjust the exposure myself on some shots, but I noticed that the photos ended up grainier when I did that. The more I worked, the more I decided that the darkness and shadows worked. The following 2 shots were the only ones I didn't edit beyond cropping:

 

That said, I do think either Auto Tone or my own adjustments improved some shots:

 

I also played around with making some shots black and white--not because I knew what I was doing, but simply because I thought they looked cool:

  

  

 

As I look back at the photos (these and others--all of which I will post on Facebook), I realize that a lot of the ones I liked tended to be dramatic. On this particular night, I was able to capture some of the passion and drama that I love about live music and I'm hopeful that I can capture other emotions and moments throughout the year--as long as I pull my camera out of my purse, of course.

Project 52: Shots 16-19

Old (May 12, 2016)

If there is one thing I have learned from the death of my grandmother it is that we don't have forever with the people we love. I was painfully reminded of that most recently on Mother's Day and thankful I had the chance to make some memories with Papi Chevy a few days later.  Since Mami Tere's death, he hasn't really left the house for anything other than doctor appointments, so when he asked my dad to take him to a local winery, my sister and I invited ourselves to tag along. While we were wine tasting at the Galleano Winery, Papi Chevy was telling us about when he used to work there and naming people he used to work with and for. The lady serving us was polite while she listened and admitted that she didn't know anyone he named. It made me think about how much my grandfather has seen and experienced--so many memories! And when he goes, they go with him.

Same Subjects, 5 Angles (May 12, 2016)

  

 

The winery had a ton of old equipment just lying around in a field near the vineyards. It looked like it had been there for a while--trust me. I did a Google Images Search on "antique tractors" and I'm pretty sure the tractor above is from the 1940s. My excitement at crossing this off my shot list outweighed my fear of spiders and bugs while I worked my way around it and closer to it. As I look at the images now, I can't help but notice how the sky (when visible) is a slightly different shade of blue in each shot. The same goes for the background. In one, you can see industrial buildings in one, and palm trees in another. This is definitely a lesson in the importance of multiple shots. When I first started taking photos, I had a very "one and done" mentality. Now, the more photos I take and the more Lightroom work I  do, the more small differences I see. I'm hopeful that's a sign I'm improving and learning.

In Full Sun (May 12, 2016)  

There was virtually no shade out there in the field so I figured it would be a good time to take my "In Full Sun" shot. It was only when I was looking at this in Lightroom that I noticed there were still shadows. Looking back now, I wonder if should have pulled back more to make the full sun more evident. I also think I need to keep an eye out for more shadows because I haven't been able to take my "Let the Shadows Tell the Story" shot. I tried doing it that day, but I couldn't seem to find a story in any of the shadows in the courtyard or yard area so on my list that shot remains.

A Street Scene (May 12, 2016)

This ended up being a long day. After the field trip and a Bad Ass Book Club meeting, I went to a local bar to see Insecure Alex and Jook the First with MC Prototype. It was a great show and I was able to take (and edit) some good shots. As we were leaving, I looked to my right while crossing the street and I couldn't help but notice how empty it was. Empty. No cars. No people. Just the street and the lights.  Now when I first started working on these shots, I thought my street scene was going to be an urban shot with lots of people and action in broad daylight. Instead, it ended up being an empty 2nd Street in Downtown Pomona a little before 11 PM. 

You can see the Antique Row sign and looking back now, it was a perfect shot to end the day. In some ways, it falls in with the theme of some of my earlier shots that day and in others, it's a juxtaposition. 

I am now right "on track" with my Project 52. It's the start of the 20th week of 2016 and I have taken 19 shots. I still don't know if I should try to take a photo a week or just keep hacking away at it the way I have been. 

Project 52: Shot 15

Your Spouse/Significant Other: How You Think of Them (sic) (April 30, 2016)

When you see my boyfriend for the first time, I know what you're thinking. The media and movies have been shaping your thinking about men who look like him for years. I hope this shot changes that.

With his dark skin and sunglasses, I am sure my boyfriend looks unfriendly. The type of person you wouldn't want in your neighborhood. The type of person you picture when listening to dedications on the Art Laboe show. The type of person Trump seems to think all Mexicans are. Look at what he's wearing though: the shirt of an alternative rock band. Now look at what he's doing: grilling barbecue chicken on an RVQ.

I think of my significant other as my opposite match. He and I have had similar experiences growing up in this country where people think they know you once they see the shade of your skin. You look at him and assume he knows Spanish; you look at me and assume I don't. I used to like dopey-looking white boys until I found this man whose background has been full of experiences both similar and opposite to mine. He has an RV (something I equate with old white men) and yet drinks the same beer that my dad does. I find that comforting. While I talk and overthink, he is quiet and thoughtful. I find that inspiring.

My significant other is a strong partner and dependable teammate. The picture indicates he is capable of feeding me, but what it doesn't show is how supportive he has been of me and all the things I've gone through during our time together, starting with my cousin's suicide the day after our first date. I've never wanted someone to take care of me: I've wanted someone strong enough to be able to take care of me if I ever needed it. Back when I was dating, my dad would tell me I was too picky; my mom, not to settle.  I am so glad I listened to my mom on this one. As a result, I found someone worthy of being with me. Someone who is as strong as I imagine myself to be. Someone whose actions show me more than words could ever tell.

Project 52: Shot 14

True Happiness (March 26, 2016)

Yes, Mexican Coke tastes like true happiness to me. No, I am not being paid to say that. Mexican Coke in a glass bottle reminds me of the time I would spend visiting my family in Mexico during the summer as a little girl. (I remember being so excited when I discovered I could buy a case of it at Costco!) This photo was taken at Mariscos Enriques, a Mexican seafood restaurant in South Ontario, and what you can't see is that a Cantinflas movie was playing on the TV in the corner--another reminder of my blissful summers in Mexico. 

Visiting Mexico as an adult isn't the same as it was when I was a child--mainly because I am now aware of some of the cultural differences which make me feel out of place at times. I remember someone once told me he could tell which kids had spent some time in the states based on how they walked. At the time, I didn't quite believe him, but now I understand what he meant. I imagine that the way I walk is one of the initial giveaways (among other things) that I'm not from down there when I visit. According to my aunt and mom, my clothes are another giveaway, but opening my mouth to speak probably removes any doubt. The self-consciousness of being an outsider now colors my experiences in Mexico these days, but true happiness was feeling I belonged anywhere I was.

Project 52: Shot 13

For the record, when I first saw this shot on my Project 52 list, I was really excited and imagined myself shooting through something and creating a really unusual, artistic shot. Maybe next year . . .

Shoot Through Something (March 25, 2016)

 

On Thursday night, I was taking some pictures of the moon from the Alta Loma High School parking lot. Those pictures were not for my Project 52; I just really like taking pictures of the moon despite the fact that they rarely come out the way I imagine they will. (To be fair, every time I shoot the moon, I imagine myself coming out with a shot that could be on the cover of National Geographic.) When I got home, I looked outside my living room and realized I could shoot the moon through the trees and that could be for my Project 52! 

Unfortunately, my backyard-moon-through-the-trees shot will not be gracing the covers or pages of any magazine in the near future. The shot would have been more impressive (atmospheric?) without the new two-story houses across the street--thank you, urban sprawl! These are the same houses whose occupants--according to my boyfriend--will now be able to look through my windows and see all the things I do with the shutters open. (I am only marginally concerned about this, but he is very concerned.)

After I was done taking my moon shots, I turned around and saw Starr in the window and I proceeded to shoot her through that which reminded me of one of my favorite quotes . . .

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land a good one of Starr.

Project 52: Shots 10-12

Again, I know this isn't the way I'm "supposed" to work my way through a Project 52, but it works for me.

Water (March 21, 2016)

I love the ocean. There is just something about being in its presence that I find soothing. I think it has a lot to do with the sound and steadiness of the crashing waves. I went to Santa Monica during my spring break and before I even got out of the car, I knew I wanted to take my water shot there. I took this one from the pier and looking back now, I think it could have been more interesting if I had gotten part of the shore in it. I might have lost some of the detail of the foam and the swells in the background though. I'm sure there's a life lesson in there somewhere--something about no regrets and being at peace with the decisions we make in the moment.

If I learned how to do nothing else during this project other than be okay with my decisions, it would not be a wasted year. 

Warmth (March 21, 2016)

I took this shot a few minutes before sunset. I couldn't remember the last time I watched the sun set until my boyfriend reminded me it had been with him in Puerto Vallarta this past summer. (I have an excellent memory.) Frankly, I'm a little frustrated that it took some editing to get the picture to look as warm as I wanted it to or thought it should. The colors in the sky were "warm" which is why I thought it would work for my warmth shot, but, ironically, it took a Lightroom effect called Old Polar to make it seem warmer. I think maybe the darkness of the water cools it down a little.

And for the record, there was a very cold ocean breeze blowing at the time.

Sky (March 21, 2016)

I cannot even begin to tell you how many gorgeous skies I have witnessed this year. Unfortunately, the sun waits for no woman to reach her destination and pull out her camera. So after watching the sun set into the Pacific Ocean, I turned around and noticed the moon already in the sky with a few pink clouds and I just had to take a couple shots. I didn't even intend this to be one of my Project 52 shots, but I wasn't pleased with the ones I did take post-sunset because the clouds seem blurry. Mainly because I still have problems getting my camera/lens to focus on the sky.

I had the same issue when I was taking some moonshots back in December. I think it has something to do with focusing on infinity. I think there's probably another life lesson in there, but I'm not ready for that one just yet. 

Project 52: Shot 9

A Furry Friend's Favorite Activity (February 27, 2016)

This photo was difficult to take mainly because I knew it was the last time I would ever see Moochie eat. Later that day, I took him in to be put down.

It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life.

He was almost 16 years old and I knew it was time to do this when I saw his appetite had changed. I had slowly noticed other changes as he grew older. Many of the articles I had read online encouraged me to identify some major changes and decide when it was time based on those. I was supposed to figure out what his favorite things to do were and then set some kind of limit like "when he can no longer do X out of Y things." I knew it was time when I noticed he would no longer race downstairs to eat after hearing the automatic feeder start dumping food into the bowl. Between that and some other things he had been doing for a while, I finally accepted that it was time.

Some of you know that I "adopted" Moochie from a little boy in the apartment complex that I lived in back when I was first married. Poor Moochie was dragged from Alta Loma to South Ontario to Rancho, from one side of the city to the other and back again. I credit him with getting me through my separation and divorce. (I "thanked" him for that by getting him a little sister a year later.) I remember he would always keep me company at night no matter where I was or how late I stayed up. It didn't matter if I was grading (and eventually sleeping) on the sofa or working on grad school stuff in my home office--he would be curled up nearby, patiently waiting for me to finish so we could go to bed. I can't even begin to count the nights that I slept on the sofa and he slept right there with me.

Moochie started his life as an outdoor cat and I can only hope that it improved when he met Justin and me. He took care of me when I needed it the most and I can only hope that he felt I had taken care of him in the years after that. I'll eventually get an impression of his pawprint and I know his ashes will be sprinkled in the ocean at Point Loma. My boyfriend showed me photos of how beautiful it is and I'm hopeful that we can go down there so I can shoot some more photos--maybe even another shot for this project. Until then, I guess this is definitely a moment from 2016 that I want to remember, albeit a painful one.